My name is Frankie.

I can't say that I'm too pleased with myself.  I'm almost ten years removed from high school where I was at my physical peak. 

I had played a variety of sports in my youth, from soccer and wrestling, to a comedic try at football and then years on the track team. I would run for hours after school, eat what I wanted, when I wanted to... without any consequence.

I was young, and things obviously change.

Then I went away to college.  I at endlessly, trying to make the most for every time I swiped my meal card in a dinning hall.  Meals were expensive and I wasn't going to waste my parent's money. I stopped going to bed at a normal time, and instead developed the habit of rarely sleeping at all.  I started drinking too.  The freedom of being away at school gave me chance to try some things that I had never done before.  I was honestly, yourvery stereotypical college student.

I didn't gain the freshmen 15.  In fact I was fine up until my Junior year. My metabolism hadn't slowed down yet, and despite not exercising anymore I really hadn't gained much weight.  Then, that third year of college came and a series of events happened that didn't mesh well with the gradual changes happening to my health...
Residence Life.  I'm grateful for living in residence halls for the last (many years) as its ultimately helped to set up my career and lead me (accidentally) to my future wife. But it also enabled some of the worst habits I could have ever developed.  My first RA job introduced me into a world of stress, late nights, drama, takeout and fast food and siting at a desk for hours. And since moving up in the system as a Hall Director at multiple institutions, a lot of those things still remain true.  I sit all day in the office.  I have meetings late into the night, I still have irregular sleeping and eating patterns, and the people I often deal with cause many different types of stress in my life.  None of that is good for my health or my weight.

Relationships. Right around the time I became an RA in undergraduate school, I also dove into a long term (and ill-fated) relationship. We were both RAs, helping to enable each other further.  Any free time we had was spent eating food, or watching movies. It helped that she was always willing to pay for everything, so eating takeout was always a quick and easy way to avoid ever even having to walk to a dining hall.

Throughout that 4 year relationship I put on over 40 pounds. Most of it coming in a span of two  short years.

While I view Residence life and relationships as causes that pushed me toward such an unhealthy lifestyle, I'm also very aware that I am the reason I put on this weight. The situations I was in certainly didn't help me, as everyone around me drank plenty, and went out to dinner all the time. They all had irregular sleeping habits and were just as unhealthy as me.  I also grew complacent in my relationship and there was an element of not caring how I looked any more too. But the point being... I let this happen. I did this to myself.

Then came one of my best friend's wedding.  There were pictures of me doing a reading and I didn't recognize myself.  I had a huge double chin. I appeared to be busting through my suit. I weighed 180 pounds.

I literally had no idea that I looked like this.

I became single not long after and decided to make some positive life changes.  I rarely ate takeout anymore and switched to a lot of soups and sandwiches. I shaved off about 7 pounds just from that, and giving up pop (soda). I then started working out a few times a week with a buddy below one of the residence halls and I quickly dropped 10 pounds. I had reached about 161 pounds at one point and felt significantly healthier.

Over the last year I put 10 pounds back on.  Again, I stopped working out (for the most part) and I'm back in a long term relationship.  I've moved twice and changed jobs twice in a little over a year and each of those jobs have required the same demands and unhealthy hours.  Again, I'm well aware and I can't get out of the funk.  I'm exhausted because I'm overweight and unhealthy, and I can't get motivated to workout.

I'm sick of it.  I play flag football with my younger brother and his friends.  They workout often and are all pretty physically fit.  I can't keep up.  I'm not strong, I'm not fast anymore and I can't go a play or two without needing to catch my breath.  It's demoralizing and it hurts even worse when everyone else knows it too.

I've recently seen a friend from my first job making positive changes in his life.  He eats significantly healthier, drinks much less then when I was there with him, and rides a stationary bike and goes walking.  He's dropped tons of weight and may even way less than me now. I'm proud and impressed by his efforts and it has been one of the inspiring factors into me knowing that I can get back in shape.

I've seen people make these changes, and now I have to. I want to. I don't like feeling this unhealthy, this nonathletic and this tired all of the time.

Today is the day I keep track of what I'm eating, and start exercising and taking all of it seriously. I want to get back to 140 pounds which is the target weight for a male who is 5 ft 7 inches and has a medium/wide frame. I need to do this.

This is Frankie Gets Fit.